Sunday, February 14, 2010

Could Time help me?

Could time explain this?
Why I couldn't throw this feeling
The sorrow still shadow my life
why I can't throw the hope that weren't be mine

Could time make me understand?
That life hide many mystery
found some precious thing
but then I must lost it and broke this heart in to pieces

Could time make me forget?
When I believe something
But then I realize thats all is absurd
I was flying too high, and make it hurt when it bump to the earth

Could time heal my pain?
When no one could help me out of it
when no one care about it
And this pain become one with my breathe

What time could do for me?
Day by day left, months changes, another year come
This memory still here and made a pain when I try to move on
When I couldn't stop hoping something that never be mine
The time could help me...
To make me stronger to handle this pain day by day
To make me understand, happiness and sadness are a bundle
and make me learn, an offer even with smile and kindness could be end on disappointment
and the biggest thing....too much hope will kill me

Friday, February 5, 2010

Learn to walk alone

Remembering time to time in our life, when we were child, we always feel safe with our parents. Both of them give us love, even sometimes on the way that we couldn't understand. At that time, we thought why our parent were so hard to understand. But when we grew older,finally we understand why them treated us so hard.

Time to go for college, almost all of us it was the first time lived so far from family. We tried to make a new family with friends, roommate, or who lived in the next door. We learn to be responsible for each other, whenever one of us met difficulties or got sick, we will become parents for them, vice versa. I always thing that friends whom I closed with on college are part of my family until now. Coz without them I couldn't pass my day happily.

Everything was change when we start it to work. Especially who always decide to move from one place to another place to work. When our colleague not only on the same age, sometimes we difficult to place us in the right way. But when we have same interest, it will be easy to make an conversation. Nothing difficult enough, when we meet everyday and could understand the way they think. Even not as close as college friend, but at least we still feel their caring.

It's not easy for me to make friendship. I always make a distance when I feel I couldn't bare when walk with them. For example : they are too diligent or too rich. Idiot thinking, isn't it, judging before try. But I am also the person who couldn't live without friend. I always need their energy to complete my life and life happily. Whenever I am feel lonely sometimes i just did a bad thing, thats why I always need them, for learn, share or guide me as well. Thats why I also prefer to talk with friends who easy going, not easy to get mad but easy to forgive.

Lucky me along my day i always find a good friend for me,with them I never feel lonely. But as we grew older and older, so many things occupied our mind, many responsibility of live, we only have limited time for sharing. Its quite difficult for me, when I lived so far from my best friend, I couldn't meet them to see their smile, or warm hug or just a quick chit chat. Contact them mean must open computer waiting them online and not busy, really afraid to bother even sometime I missed them too much.

So, from now on, I'd rather to learn how to walk alone, try to solve my problem with my own, try to find a way to cheer up my day even without other help, try to accept but I won't talk to anybody during days, accepting the silent surrounding. Its quite difficult shifting everything and accept this, Sometimes make me feel so lonely and so sad. But I choose to learn walking alone, and I will think it's A GIFT if on one of my days I could feel the warmest of my friendship. As we know... GIFT won't ever come daily, and I already thanks to them come to my life as A PRECIOUS GIFT.

Now I am so good,just really like Miley Cyrus song "the climb"
I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose


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