Let your heart behind

Sometimes life using heart just annoyed for some people. Changing mood so easily from happy too sad. When we couldn't get what you want to have, will make us desperate so badly. If it happen we could guess, our day start ruin in every way. We couldn't do anything well, because did it only with half of our heart.

Some people get this ruin heart when they find only one side love, or feeling abandon, no one care. It throw them in loneliness. This kind of feeling really distract our life a lot. And one time they couldn't control their feeling, darkness life will be with them. It feels like no sun shine anymore.

So what we must do? I just share my experience even it not always suitable for anyone. I always feel like that since I was teenager, dont ask me why ;). That time I only keep all pain, make my brain busy and write all thing to release your burden. If you have a friend you could trust, just share with them, but we know it always hard to find a friend both we can trust and not judging. Same as me even I have many friend, but really no one knew me fully. Because I don't dare to tell about what happen in my self completely with one friend even I feel desperate too much.

Sometime this heart problem come from our relationship with others. Please be brave to speak frankly, I know sometimes it wont give a good result for us, but at least it make some burden in your heart lift. Don't forget to ask an apologize and let your friend knew, you need it to cure your heart. By talking with people we have heart problem with, it will help you to have a negative thinking, or could stop your day dreaming.

About feeling abandon also lack of care, just don't ask too much, if you not get what you need, just accept it. We know, nothing can change this situation faster if it already happen years, if you could face it in years before, think it that u will be fine in your years ahead. Thats true, it will make us unhappy sometimes, thats why I will tell you, LET YOUR HEART BEHIND if its all about yourself, try to make your brain busy to think, you make many physically activity in your days rather than your feeling. I know, its really empty, but it will help you not ruin your life. Even our life couldn't say as a happy life, but at least it won't make u drown into sadness, and won't make your life worse day by day.

write it when I thought I must back to my life as before... busy to think dont bother with love or care, so I could move on

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You Just Perfect for Me

In our life, we never stop to find something that we think perfect. Sometimes we feel we find something that good enough for us but when the time passed by we finally find their weakness. When we feel disappointed and feel can't accept it, then we try to find a new one.

It happen in anything, not just a thing, but maybe in friendship. We meet someone that we can talk a lot for long and feel happy when talking with her/him. But as time passed by, we find it that she/he have many that will make us think that she/he is not the perfect one.

For example; after a long talk with her/him we realize that even she/he is someone we feel comfort to talk with, but she or he not good enough in appearance. You feel shy when you go out together with her. So you think better you find out the one that we could comfortable to talk with also have a good appearance as well. Yeah, nothing wrong with that, but do you ever think, you must be gamble with your luck to find that, it would be take times to find it, and the result still questionable. And while you try to find the new one you ignore what you have right now. Maybe he/she have a wide heart, they always forgive you when u abandoned him/her, but don't you think you have scratch their heart anyway?

Or maybe, you have a sweet friend, not only handsome or beautiful but really good friend. She always care for you, maybe too care, sending you many message. First of all you just feel happy for her/his care, but then you realize that it so annoying receive message anytime. You feel like she/he bother you a lot. Then you start to think find another friend that care enough but not bother you indeed.

We are human that never satisfy with anything. But never you just sit down thinking about it carefully

You Just perfect for me
Never think about other talk about your appearance
because they never know that you could make me laugh when I am in tears
They also never know that you never leave me feel lonely with your friendly message
And she/he always happy to share anything with me even I already lose from her/his world for so long
They never know that even I felt I have make her/him disappointed but they still say 'dont worry about that, I am always happy when talk to you, that's enough for me'

You just perfect for Me
even though I feel you habit so annoying, but I just realize that's the way to show you care
I never have it from anyone such form as caring,
I only could try hard to understand that you do that coz you think I deserve for that

You just perfect for me
because you are my friend
you just perfect for me
because I know you put your warm heart in our friendship
You just perfect for me
Coz I knew U also could accept my weakness
You just perfect for me
Because we both not perfect but try to accept it in anyway

write this when I felt I am not prefect but I always feel you just perfect, hope anyone who know me accept my weakness

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Could Time help me?

Could time explain this?
Why I couldn't throw this feeling
The sorrow still shadow my life
why I can't throw the hope that weren't be mine

Could time make me understand?
That life hide many mystery
found some precious thing
but then I must lost it and broke this heart in to pieces


Could time make me forget?
When I believe something
But then I realize thats all is absurd
I was flying too high, and make it hurt when it bump to the earth

Could time heal my pain?
When no one could help me out of it
when no one care about it
And this pain become one with my breathe

What time could do for me?
Day by day left, months changes, another year come
This memory still here and made a pain when I try to move on
When I couldn't stop hoping something that never be mine
Maybe......
The time could help me...
To make me stronger to handle this pain day by day
To make me understand, happiness and sadness are a bundle
and make me learn, an offer even with smile and kindness could be end on disappointment
and the biggest thing....too much hope will kill me

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Learn to walk alone

Remembering time to time in our life, when we were child, we always feel safe with our parents. Both of them give us love, even sometimes on the way that we couldn't understand. At that time, we thought why our parent were so hard to understand. But when we grew older,finally we understand why them treated us so hard.

Time to go for college, almost all of us it was the first time lived so far from family. We tried to make a new family with friends, roommate, or who lived in the next door. We learn to be responsible for each other, whenever one of us met difficulties or got sick, we will become parents for them, vice versa. I always thing that friends whom I closed with on college are part of my family until now. Coz without them I couldn't pass my day happily.


Everything was change when we start it to work. Especially who always decide to move from one place to another place to work. When our colleague not only on the same age, sometimes we difficult to place us in the right way. But when we have same interest, it will be easy to make an conversation. Nothing difficult enough, when we meet everyday and could understand the way they think. Even not as close as college friend, but at least we still feel their caring.

It's not easy for me to make friendship. I always make a distance when I feel I couldn't bare when walk with them. For example : they are too diligent or too rich. Idiot thinking, isn't it, judging before try. But I am also the person who couldn't live without friend. I always need their energy to complete my life and life happily. Whenever I am feel lonely sometimes i just did a bad thing, thats why I always need them, for learn, share or guide me as well. Thats why I also prefer to talk with friends who easy going, not easy to get mad but easy to forgive.

Lucky me along my day i always find a good friend for me,with them I never feel lonely. But as we grew older and older, so many things occupied our mind, many responsibility of live, we only have limited time for sharing. Its quite difficult for me, when I lived so far from my best friend, I couldn't meet them to see their smile, or warm hug or just a quick chit chat. Contact them mean must open computer waiting them online and not busy, really afraid to bother even sometime I missed them too much.

So, from now on, I'd rather to learn how to walk alone, try to solve my problem with my own, try to find a way to cheer up my day even without other help, try to accept but I won't talk to anybody during days, accepting the silent surrounding. Its quite difficult shifting everything and accept this, Sometimes make me feel so lonely and so sad. But I choose to learn walking alone, and I will think it's A GIFT if on one of my days I could feel the warmest of my friendship. As we know... GIFT won't ever come daily, and I already thanks to them come to my life as A PRECIOUS GIFT.

Now I am so good,just really like Miley Cyrus song "the climb"

I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Yap Just KEEP GOING by My OWN

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